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The challenge of adolescence is to balance the right of the parents to feel they are in charge with the need of the adolescent to gain independence.

We should not medicate the boys so they fit the school; we should change the school to fit the boy. (Leonard Sax, M.D. Ph.D)

Removing a child from a traumatic environment does not remove the trauma from the child's memory.

"Rules without relationship leads to rebellion" (Josh McDowell)

It's more effective to reward your child for being "good" (appropriate) than to punish him for being "bad" (inappropriate).

Criticism is not a motivator.

If you (parents) tend to overreact to your child's misbehaviour - your child learns that he can't trust you. Mom, Dad, stay regulated!

The quickest way to change your child’s behaviour is to first change your own.

Don't wait for him to turn 10 before you reveal that you are not in fact the hired help whose job it is to clean up after him.

If you are headed in the wrong direction as a parent - you are allowed to make a U-turn.

Learn more.

Depression & Discipline

CONFLICT AND DISCIPLINE
 
– conflict in a home with a teenager is inevitable
– challenge for parents is to balance firmness with support and encouragement
-parenting a depressed teen is particularly challenging
                  – “walking on eggshells”
                  – scared of pushing too far
 
TIPS
1. “Pause” button
                                    – don’t get sucked into full-scale war
                                    – exit & wait
                                    – brain dead phrases
                                    – reflectors
2. active listening
3. communicate respectfully & calmly
4. negotiate
5. give choices
6. recharge your own batteries
                                    – proper eating, sleeping
                                    – pursue a hobby
                                    – get help – clergy, support group
 
ALL FAMILIES HAVE PROBLEMS
                  – the difference between healthy & unhealthy families is how they deal with them.
                  – healthy families:                -acknowledge the problem
                                                                        -take positive steps to resolve them

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Workshops

+ Behaviour Management (now available online)

This full day or 2 evening workshop will introduce you […]

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+ Lick Your Kids

  “Lick Your Kids” (figuratively not literally) (2 hours) First […]

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+ A Parent’s Guide to the Teenage Brain

  A teenager’s brain is not just an adult brain […]

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+ Reading Rescue

A program for children with reading problems

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+ Taming a Toddler

Many parents wonder what hit them when their sweet little baby turns into an unreasonable toddler – ideas for dealing with mealtime, bedtime, temper tanturms, toilet training, noncompliance, etc.

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See more of our workshops


Contact

2720 Rath Street, Putnam, Ontario
NOL 2BO

Phone: (519) 485-4678
Fax: (519) 485-0281

Email: info@rickharper.ca

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Parents' Comments

“Implementing Rick’s techniques and adhering to them is exhausting, but it is a healthy exhaustion rather than the detrimental exhaustion I used to experience.”

(B.F. – Woodstock)