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The challenge of adolescence is to balance the right of the parents to feel they are in charge with the need of the adolescent to gain independence.

Criticism is not a motivator.

It is what we say and do when we're angry that creates the very model our children will follow when dealing with their own frustrations.

Removing a child from a traumatic environment does not remove the trauma from the child's memory.

"Unexpressed feeling never die. They are buried alive and come back later in ugly ways." (Stephen Covey)

Whining and crying are employed by kids for the purpose of getting something. If it works, then it was worth the effort and will be repeated.

Early intervention is always better than crisis management - but it is never too late to do the right thing.

Parenting style matters - a lot!

The quickest way to change your child’s behaviour is to first change your own.

Children today are under enormous pressures rarely experienced by their parents or grandparents. Many of today's children are being enticed to grow up too quickly and are encountering challenges for which they are totally unprepared.

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Symptoms of “Executive Dysfunction”

These are the kinds of things that make living with or working with an ADHD child challenging.

  • lack of foresight (unable to predict consequences for his/her behaviour)
  • poor hindsight (“Johnny, how many times do I have to tell you to  . . . )
  • live for the minute (the future and past do not exist)
  • poor organization (unable to “get it together” in A.M.)
  • trouble returning to a task (“Johnny, you never complete anything”)
  • poor sense of time (“Johnny, you can’t spend 1 hour on the first 2 questions”)
  • time moves too slowly (“Are we almost there?”)
  • poor self talk (“Johnny, what were you thinking)
  • poor sense of self awareness (answer to above question – “I don’t have a clue”)
  • poor internalization and generalization of rules (“Why do I have to tell you the same thing over and over”)
  • poor reading of social clues (“Johnny, can’t you see that the other children think that’s weird”)
  • inconsistent work and behaviour (“Johnny, if you could do it well yesterday, why is today so horrible”)
  • trouble with transitions (“Johnny, why do you curse at me when I’m just calling you for dinner”)
  • hyper focused at times (“When Johnny is on the computer, I can’t get him off”)
  • poor frustration tolerance (“Johnny, it’s no big deal. Just get over it”)
  • frequently overwhelmed (“Stop, stop, I can’t stand it”)
  • angry (quickly and frequently)
  • push away those trying to help
  • over reacting (but it’s really over feeling)
  • inflexible, explosive reactions
  • thrill seeking behaviours
  • trouble paying attention to others
  • trouble making and keeping friends
  • sense of failure to achieve goals

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Workshops

+ Behaviour Management (now available online)

This full day or 2 evening workshop will introduce you […]

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+ Lick Your Kids

  “Lick Your Kids” (figuratively not literally) (2 hours) First […]

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+ A Parent’s Guide to the Teenage Brain

  A teenager’s brain is not just an adult brain […]

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+ Reading Rescue

A program for children with reading problems

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+ Taming a Toddler

Many parents wonder what hit them when their sweet little baby turns into an unreasonable toddler – ideas for dealing with mealtime, bedtime, temper tanturms, toilet training, noncompliance, etc.

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See more of our workshops


Contact

2720 Rath Street, Putnam, Ontario
NOL 2BO

Phone: (519) 485-4678
Fax: (519) 485-0281

Email: info@rickharper.ca

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Parents' Comments

“Our psychiatrist recommended Rick to help us sort out behaviour management issues for our autistic son. He was an invaluable help.”

(C.C. – Sarnia)