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"Parents aren't the cause of ADHD, but they are part of the solution." (Kenny Handleman, M.D.)

Don't wait for him to turn 10 before you reveal that you are not in fact the hired help whose job it is to clean up after him.

Setting limits teaches your children valuable skills they will use the rest of their lives. One day, they will report to a job where their ability to follow rules will dictate their success.

The best inheritance  parents can give their children is a few minutes of their time each day.

Children today are under enormous pressures rarely experienced by their parents or grandparents. Many of today's children are being enticed to grow up too quickly and are encountering challenges for which they are totally unprepared.

Parents are the external regulator for kids who cannot regulate themselves.

There has been an explosion in the prescribing of medication for very young children, particularly preschool and kindergarten boys (Juli Zito , Univ. of Maryland)

"To be a man, a boy must see a man."  (J.R. Moehringer)

Relationships matter:  change comes through forming trusting relationships. People, not programs change people.

"Moody" and "unpredictable" are adjectives parents will often use when referring to their teenagers.

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Tactics for Tantrums (Part 2)

 

 

Tactic # 3

The “I” Approach

This method is related to the previous “I Feel” technique. For the child who is more verbal and beginning to reason, a simple explanation of the parent’s feelings often help; for example, “It makes me unhappy (or uneasy, nervous, angry, upset) to see you act like this.”

This provides another context  for encouraging expression of feelings in terms of “I”. That is, there is more than a shade of difference between the comment “You are acting foolish and making me unhappy (which labels the child’s motive as bad and unhealthy) and a comment such as “When I see this I feel unhappy” ( which puts the label on the the parent where it belongs). The parent can also suggest that if the child ceases this behaviour, she will make the parent feel better and happier. This demonstrates to the child that there are other feelings to consider and that she is capable of improving another’s mood by a change in her own actions.

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Workshops

+ Behaviour Management (now available online)

This full day or 2 evening workshop will introduce you […]

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+ A Parent’s Guide to the Teenage Brain

  A teenager’s brain is not just an adult brain […]

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+ Reading Rescue

A program for children with reading problems

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+ A Guided Tour of ADHD (now available online)

This workshop will present the facts, myths, misconceptions, controversy and […]

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See more of our workshops


Contact

2720 Rath Street, Putnam, Ontario
NOL 2BO

Phone: (519) 485-4678
Fax: (519) 485-0281

Email: info@rickharper.ca

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Parents' Comments

“Our daughter was the joy of our life until she turned 13, then all hell broke loose. Rick helped us understand what was happening to her and we made some adjustments that helped us get through it. She’s now in University and doing well.”

(D.A. – St. Thomas)