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Me in a nutshell. LINKS
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Ideas and suggestions on "how to".

The way we talk to our children becomes their inner voice. (Peggy O'Mara)

"Rules without relationship leads to rebellion" (Josh McDowell)

The best inheritance parents can give their children is a few minutes of their time each day.

When a child is disregulated - is the time parents need to be regulated.

The challenge of adolescence is to balance the right of the parents to feel they are in charge with the need of the adolescent to gain independence.

Good parenting requires sacrifice. Childhood lasts for only a few brief years , but it should be given priority while it is passing before your eyes

Adolescence can be the cruelest place on earth. It can really be heartless. ( Tori Amos)

Removing a child from a traumatic environment does not remove the trauma from the child's memory.

"Unexpressed feeling never die. They are buried alive and come back later in ugly ways." (Stephen Covey)

You cannot reason with someone who is being unreasonable.

The more 2 parents differ in their approaches to discipline, the more likely it leads to trouble for the child.

If you (parents) tend to overreact to your child's misbehaviour - your child learns that he can't trust you. Mom, Dad, stay regulated!

A tantruming toddler is a little ball of writhing muscle and incredible strength. It's like trying to carry a greased pig past a slop bucket.

Parents are the external regulator for kids who cannot regulate themselves.

"Cutting" is a visible sign to the world that you are hurting.

The mistake that Sharon and I both made is we never set any boundaries. (Ozzy Osbourne)

Children mimic well. They catch what they see better than they follow what they hear.

Many clinicians find it easier to tell parents their child has a brain-based disorder than suggest parenting changes. Jennifer Harris (psychiatrist)

The quickest way to change your child’s behaviour is to first change your own.

It's more effective to reward your child for being "good" (appropriate) than to punish him for being "bad" (inappropriate).

Parenting style matters - a lot!

"Parents aren't the cause of ADHD, but they are part of the solution." (Kenny Handleman, M.D.)

"Moody" and "unpredictable" are adjectives parents will often use when referring to their teenagers.

Don't wait for him to turn 10 before you reveal that you are not in fact the hired help whose job it is to clean up after him.

"The thing that impresses me most about North America is the way parents obey their children" (King Edward VII , 1841-1910)

Being a parent of a teenager can cure a person of narcissism.

Children do not develop on their own - they only develop within relationships.

Children fare better when expectations on them are clear and firm.

It is what we say and do when we're angry that creates the very model our children will follow when dealing with their own frustrations.

The teenage years require a delicate balance between the young person's need to gain independence, and the parent's need to retain authority.

If you are headed in the wrong direction as a parent - you are allowed to make a U-turn.

Children today are under enormous pressures rarely experienced by their parents or grandparents. Many of today's children are being enticed to grow up too quickly and are encountering challenges for which they are totally unprepared.

If it was going to be easy to raise kids, it never would have started with something called "labour".

Criticism is not a motivator.

Relationships matter: change comes through forming trusting relationships. People, not programs change people.

Setting limits teaches your children valuable skills they will use the rest of their lives. One day, they will report to a job where their ability to follow rules will dictate their success.

We should not medicate the boys so they fit the school; we should change the school to fit the boy. (Leonard Sax, M.D. Ph.D)

"To be a man, a boy must see a man." (J.R. Moehringer)

Hurt people hurt people.

There has been an explosion in the prescribing of medication for very young children, particularly preschool and kindergarten boys (Juli Zito , Univ. of Maryland)

Early intervention is always better than crisis management - but it is never too late to do the right thing.

If there is no relationship - nothing else matters !

Whining and crying are employed by kids for the purpose of getting something. If it works, then it was worth the effort and will be repeated.

Simple rules adhered to when children are young can prevent more serious problems later.

Wouldn't it be nice if children would simply listen and learn.

Some hope their children will be like sponges soaking up the truth and wisdom imparted by their parents. However appealing this philosophy might be, it seldom seems to catch on with their children.

Learn more.

Workshops

+ Behaviour Management (now available online)

This full day or 2 evening workshop will introduce you […]

Learn more

+ Lick Your Kids

“Lick Your Kids” (figuratively not literally) (2 hours) First […]

Learn more

+ A Parent’s Guide to the Teenage Brain

A teenager’s brain is not just an adult brain […]

Learn more

+ Reading Rescue

A program for children with reading problems

Learn more

+ Taming a Toddler

Many parents wonder what hit them when their sweet little baby turns into an unreasonable toddler – ideas for dealing with mealtime, bedtime, temper tanturms, toilet training, noncompliance, etc.

Learn more

See more of our workshops

Contact

2720 Rath Street, Putnam, Ontario
NOL 2BO

Phone: (519) 485-4678
Fax: (519) 485-0281

Email: info@rickharper.ca

Parents' Comments

“Our daughter was the joy of our life until she turned 13, then all hell broke loose. Rick helped us understand what was happening to her and we made some adjustments that helped us get through it. She’s now in University and doing well.”

(D.A. – St. Thomas)

Parenting is the most important job you will ever do.

It can also be the most difficult!

The way we talk to our children becomes their inner voice. (Peggy O'Mara)

"Rules without relationship leads to rebellion" (Josh McDowell)

The best inheritance parents can give their children is a few minutes of their time each day.

When a child is disregulated - is the time parents need to be regulated.

The challenge of adolescence is to balance the right of the parents to feel they are in charge with the need of the adolescent to gain independence.

Good parenting requires sacrifice. Childhood lasts for only a few brief years , but it should be given priority while it is passing before your eyes

Adolescence can be the cruelest place on earth. It can really be heartless. ( Tori Amos)

Removing a child from a traumatic environment does not remove the trauma from the child's memory.

"Unexpressed feeling never die. They are buried alive and come back later in ugly ways." (Stephen Covey)

You cannot reason with someone who is being unreasonable.

The more 2 parents differ in their approaches to discipline, the more likely it leads to trouble for the child.

If you (parents) tend to overreact to your child's misbehaviour - your child learns that he can't trust you. Mom, Dad, stay regulated!

A tantruming toddler is a little ball of writhing muscle and incredible strength. It's like trying to carry a greased pig past a slop bucket.

Parents are the external regulator for kids who cannot regulate themselves.

"Cutting" is a visible sign to the world that you are hurting.

The mistake that Sharon and I both made is we never set any boundaries. (Ozzy Osbourne)

Children mimic well. They catch what they see better than they follow what they hear.

Many clinicians find it easier to tell parents their child has a brain-based disorder than suggest parenting changes. Jennifer Harris (psychiatrist)

The quickest way to change your child’s behaviour is to first change your own.

It's more effective to reward your child for being "good" (appropriate) than to punish him for being "bad" (inappropriate).

Parenting style matters - a lot!

"Parents aren't the cause of ADHD, but they are part of the solution." (Kenny Handleman, M.D.)

"Moody" and "unpredictable" are adjectives parents will often use when referring to their teenagers.

Don't wait for him to turn 10 before you reveal that you are not in fact the hired help whose job it is to clean up after him.

"The thing that impresses me most about North America is the way parents obey their children" (King Edward VII , 1841-1910)

Being a parent of a teenager can cure a person of narcissism.

Children do not develop on their own - they only develop within relationships.

Children fare better when expectations on them are clear and firm.

It is what we say and do when we're angry that creates the very model our children will follow when dealing with their own frustrations.

The teenage years require a delicate balance between the young person's need to gain independence, and the parent's need to retain authority.

If you are headed in the wrong direction as a parent - you are allowed to make a U-turn.

Children today are under enormous pressures rarely experienced by their parents or grandparents. Many of today's children are being enticed to grow up too quickly and are encountering challenges for which they are totally unprepared.

If it was going to be easy to raise kids, it never would have started with something called "labour".

Criticism is not a motivator.

Relationships matter: change comes through forming trusting relationships. People, not programs change people.

Setting limits teaches your children valuable skills they will use the rest of their lives. One day, they will report to a job where their ability to follow rules will dictate their success.

We should not medicate the boys so they fit the school; we should change the school to fit the boy. (Leonard Sax, M.D. Ph.D)

"To be a man, a boy must see a man." (J.R. Moehringer)

Hurt people hurt people.

There has been an explosion in the prescribing of medication for very young children, particularly preschool and kindergarten boys (Juli Zito , Univ. of Maryland)

Early intervention is always better than crisis management - but it is never too late to do the right thing.

If there is no relationship - nothing else matters !

Whining and crying are employed by kids for the purpose of getting something. If it works, then it was worth the effort and will be repeated.

Simple rules adhered to when children are young can prevent more serious problems later.

Wouldn't it be nice if children would simply listen and learn.

Some hope their children will be like sponges soaking up the truth and wisdom imparted by their parents. However appealing this philosophy might be, it seldom seems to catch on with their children.

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Parents' Comments