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"Unexpressed feeling never die. They are buried alive and come back later in ugly ways." (Stephen Covey)

The quickest way to change your child’s behaviour is to first change your own.

It's more effective to reward your child for being "good" (appropriate) than to punish him for being "bad" (inappropriate).

Some hope their children will be like sponges soaking up the truth and wisdom imparted by their parents. However appealing this philosophy might be, it seldom seems to catch on with their children.

The mistake that Sharon and I both made is we never set any boundaries.  (Ozzy Osbourne)

Hurt people hurt people.

Don't wait for him to turn 10 before you reveal that you are not in fact the hired help whose job it is to clean up after him.

Children do not develop on their own - they only develop within relationships.

If there is no relationship - nothing else matters !

The challenge of adolescence is to balance the right of the parents to feel they are in charge with the need of the adolescent to gain independence.

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Question to Behavioural Management Systems

 

We have an 8 month old daughter who is very fussy. She cries whenever I put her down and won’t stop until I pick her up again. This happens all day long. I’m getting real tired of it. Please help me.

Answer:

Crying is your babies form of communicating. It is how she lets you know she is hungry, wet, dirty , tired, etc. It is vitally important that you respond appropriately to legitimate cries for help. However, it is possible to create a fussy, demanding baby by responding every time she cries. Babies are fully capable of learning how to manipulate mom and dad. When a new born infants cries parents need to respond and attempt to find the source of discomfort and resolve it. By the time a child is 8 months old, most parents can tell if a cry is communicating genuine distress or simply a desire to be picked up . Picking up an 8 month old baby every time she cries is teaching her a lesson you do not want her to learn. Do not be afraid to let an 8 month old baby cry for a reasonable amount of time when you know by the tone that there is no significant problem that needs to be resolved. You  want the child to learn how to self soothe and responding immediately to an OLDER baby’s every whimper is counter productive.

 

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Workshops

+ Behaviour Management (now available online)

This full day or 2 evening workshop will introduce you […]

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+ A Parent’s Guide to the Teenage Brain

  A teenager’s brain is not just an adult brain […]

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+ Reading Rescue

A program for children with reading problems

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+ A Guided Tour of ADHD (now available online)

This workshop will present the facts, myths, misconceptions, controversy and […]

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Contact

2720 Rath Street, Putnam, Ontario
NOL 2BO

Phone: (519) 485-4678
Fax: (519) 485-0281

Email: info@rickharper.ca

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Parents' Comments

“We are foster parents who took in a 13 year old girl (going on 18!) and she ran us through the wringer. Rick helped us learn how to set limits that made the difference.”

(G.E. – Strathroy)