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The teenage years require a delicate balance between the young person's need to gain independence, and the parent's need to retain authority.

The challenge of adolescence is to balance the right of the parents to feel they are in charge with the need of the adolescent to gain independence.

You cannot reason with someone who is being unreasonable.

Early intervention is always better than crisis management - but it is never too late to do the right thing.

"To be a man, a boy must see a man."  (J.R. Moehringer)

Children do not develop on their own - they only develop within relationships.

Setting limits teaches your children valuable skills they will use the rest of their lives. One day, they will report to a job where their ability to follow rules will dictate their success.

Don't wait for him to turn 10 before you reveal that you are not in fact the hired help whose job it is to clean up after him.

Simple rules adhered to when children are young can prevent more serious problems later.

Some hope their children will be like sponges soaking up the truth and wisdom imparted by their parents. However appealing this philosophy might be, it seldom seems to catch on with their children.

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Caregiving – FASD (part 3)

3 steps to managing children with FASD

a) Recognize that FASD is a medical condition

– FASD is not a bad attitude

– it must be treated as a medical condition

– society has denied this reality of FASD and blames the indivivual

– “just sit down and behave” is unrealistic

– punishing a child with FASD for brain damage is useless

– society (homes, schools, treatment centres, hospitals, jail) seldom provide adequate                                          supports

– children with visible handicaps receive more supports

b)  Involve the individual with FASD in their management as early as possible

– often caregivers shield the individual from their diagnosis  – shame, guilt

– best if the individual knows the truth

– care must be taken to not remove responsibility from the child for his actions (this is a                                      delicate balancing act)

c) Discard or modify treatments that have previously failed

– the “usual” interventions fail because individuals with FASD cannot learn in the time                                    given to them

– the individual lacks impulse control. boundaries, etc.

– interventions are too short term – caregivers give up too soon

– schools try to “mainstream” when the child is unable to cope behaviourally or                                                   socially

There is no single approach that is best for all FASD children!

Whatever approach is used, compassion is vital but it can become lost in the day to day struggles, challenges, failures and misbehaviours.

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Workshops

+ Behaviour Management (now available online)

This full day or 2 evening workshop will introduce you […]

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+ A Parent’s Guide to the Teenage Brain

  A teenager’s brain is not just an adult brain […]

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+ Reading Rescue

A program for children with reading problems

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+ A Guided Tour of ADHD (now available online)

This workshop will present the facts, myths, misconceptions, controversy and […]

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See more of our workshops


Contact

2720 Rath Street, Putnam, Ontario
NOL 2BO

Phone: (519) 485-4678
Fax: (519) 485-0281

Email: info@rickharper.ca

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Parents' Comments

“I am no longer overwhelmed with a child who has unending discipline and behaviour problems.”

(P.S. – London)