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Relationships matter:  change comes through forming trusting relationships. People, not programs change people.

"Cutting" is a visible sign to the world that you are hurting.

"To be a man, a boy must see a man."  (J.R. Moehringer)

Children do not develop on their own - they only develop within relationships.

Hurt people hurt people.

Criticism is not a motivator.

A tantruming toddler is a little ball of writhing muscle and incredible strength. It's like trying to carry a greased pig past a slop bucket.

Being a parent of a teenager can cure a person of narcissism.

Some hope their children will be like sponges soaking up the truth and wisdom imparted by their parents. However appealing this philosophy might be, it seldom seems to catch on with their children.

Children today are under enormous pressures rarely experienced by their parents or grandparents. Many of today's children are being enticed to grow up too quickly and are encountering challenges for which they are totally unprepared.

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Arguing

 

 
 
 
 
 
ARGUING

 

 A child can only argue with someone who is willing to argue with him.

 Children only argue with adults who take the bait.

CONTROLLING ARGUING

When he/she starts to argue

1. give him a choice: “either stay her and stop arguing”

OR

“go someplace else in the house and argue with yourself

no yelling, no anger, no time-out, no arguing

– you are giving him a choice with wide parameters

(if he continues arguing and he probably will)

 

 2. take away his best previous choice (“staying here” and replace it with a less preferable one): – “either go someplace else and argue”

OR

“go to your room”

– no yelling, anger or arguing

you are continuing to give choices but the parameters are becoming narrower

(if he continues)

3. keep taking away the best option and replace it with a less preferable option:– “either go to your room

OR

“time out”

4. other options

OR      “no TV”

“ fine”

“take away a treasure”

“withdrawal of privileges”

Our hope is that the child will learn to make good decisions for himself – or you will !


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Workshops

+ Behaviour Management (now available online)

This full day or 2 evening workshop will introduce you […]

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+ A Parent’s Guide to the Teenage Brain

  A teenager’s brain is not just an adult brain […]

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+ Reading Rescue

A program for children with reading problems

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+ A Guided Tour of ADHD (now available online)

This workshop will present the facts, myths, misconceptions, controversy and […]

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See more of our workshops


Contact

2720 Rath Street, Putnam, Ontario
NOL 2BO

Phone: (519) 485-4678
Fax: (519) 485-0281

Email: info@rickharper.ca

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Parents' Comments

“Our psychiatrist recommended Rick to help us sort out behaviour management issues for our autistic son. He was an invaluable help.”

(C.C. – Sarnia)