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The challenge of adolescence is to balance the right of the parents to feel they are in charge with the need of the adolescent to gain independence.

Some hope their children will be like sponges soaking up the truth and wisdom imparted by their parents. However appealing this philosophy might be, it seldom seems to catch on with their children.

Relationships matter:  change comes through forming trusting relationships. People, not programs change people.

Children today are under enormous pressures rarely experienced by their parents or grandparents. Many of today's children are being enticed to grow up too quickly and are encountering challenges for which they are totally unprepared.

A tantruming toddler is a little ball of writhing muscle and incredible strength. It's like trying to carry a greased pig past a slop bucket.

"Cutting" is a visible sign to the world that you are hurting.

It's more effective to reward your child for being "good" (appropriate) than to punish him for being "bad" (inappropriate).

We should not medicate the boys so they fit the school; we should change the school to fit the boy. (Leonard Sax, M.D. Ph.D)

If you (parents) tend to overreact to your child's misbehaviour - your child learns that he can't trust you. Mom, Dad, stay regulated!

Parenting style matters - a lot!

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Consequencing Teenagers

Identifying and following through on appropriate consequences is a necessary but challenging task   for many parents of teenagers . A consequence for inappropriate behaviour typically involves one of two directions:

a) removing a desirable ( example – removal of computer privileges)

b) adding an undesirable (example – extra chores)

Removing something the teen wants is usually more effective than adding something he/she doesn’t want.

Why? – often the teenager is already involved in a very busy schedule (school, part time jobs, athletics, etc) and there just isn’t time.

– it requires more of the parent’s time to supervise and monitor the added responsibilities

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Workshops

+ Behaviour Management (now available online)

This full day or 2 evening workshop will introduce you […]

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+ A Parent’s Guide to the Teenage Brain

  A teenager’s brain is not just an adult brain […]

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+ Reading Rescue

A program for children with reading problems

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+ A Guided Tour of ADHD (now available online)

This workshop will present the facts, myths, misconceptions, controversy and […]

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See more of our workshops


Contact

2720 Rath Street, Putnam, Ontario
NOL 2BO

Phone: (519) 485-4678
Fax: (519) 485-0281

Email: info@rickharper.ca

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Parents' Comments

“I wish we had found Rick 2 years ago. We could have saved ourselves and our son a lot of trouble.”

(T.T. – Byron)