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Some hope their children will be like sponges soaking up the truth and wisdom imparted by their parents. However appealing this philosophy might be, it seldom seems to catch on with their children.

If there is no relationship - nothing else matters !

Children mimic well. They catch what they see better than they follow what they hear.

"Moody" and "unpredictable" are adjectives parents will often use when referring to their teenagers.

"Unexpressed feeling never die. They are buried alive and come back later in ugly ways." (Stephen Covey)

Setting limits teaches your children valuable skills they will use the rest of their lives. One day, they will report to a job where their ability to follow rules will dictate their success.

Parents are the external regulator for kids who cannot regulate themselves.

The way we talk to our children becomes their inner voice. (Peggy O'Mara)

You cannot reason with someone who is being unreasonable.

It's more effective to reward your child for being "good" (appropriate) than to punish him for being "bad" (inappropriate).

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The Changing Brain

 

Our brains constantly change over our lifetime as we develop and age. As a consequence, the way various brain functions work also changes, sometimes for better and sometimes for worse.

The brain of a newborn is far from developed; it needs time to fully grow and establish connections on both large and small scales. Our brain’s functions improve drastically throughout childhood and adolescence, following a generally predictably progression. It is only in our mid 20′s that we finally possess a fully-equipped brain, complete with a well-developed prefrontal cortex to help each of us succeed in leading an independent life as an adult.

Even after the brain is fully formed in young adulthood, researchers have found the functions that benefit from accumulated experience, such as vocabulary-related language skills, pattern recognition and emotional self-regulation, tend to improve decade after decade.

On the other hand, starting in our late 20′s and early 30′s, the research shows that speed of processing and working memory tend (on average) to slow down, reducing our capacity to process and deal with complex new information. This is a gradual process that often first  becomes noticeable in our early 40′s. Of course, individuals vary significantly in how and when they experience this decline: some people experience a significant decline while others do not.

In short, “old dogs” can certainly learn – faster than “young dogs” in domains that benefit from accumulated experience, and slower in domains that change too rapidly for accumulated experience to accrue a significant benefit.

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Workshops

+ Behaviour Management (now available online)

This full day or 2 evening workshop will introduce you […]

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+ A Parent’s Guide to the Teenage Brain

  A teenager’s brain is not just an adult brain […]

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+ Reading Rescue

A program for children with reading problems

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+ A Guided Tour of ADHD (now available online)

This workshop will present the facts, myths, misconceptions, controversy and […]

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See more of our workshops


Contact

2720 Rath Street, Putnam, Ontario
NOL 2BO

Phone: (519) 485-4678
Fax: (519) 485-0281

Email: info@rickharper.ca

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Parents' Comments

“Rick’s approach is so logical. He helped us clearly define the problem, analyze what has happened and select the best strategy. We now feel empowered to do something positive for our kid”

(A.N. – Tillsonburg)