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The teenage years require a delicate balance between the young person's need to gain independence, and the parent's need to retain authority.

Children do not develop on their own - they only develop within relationships.

Don't wait for him to turn 10 before you reveal that you are not in fact the hired help whose job it is to clean up after him.

Children fare better when expectations on them are clear and firm.

You cannot reason with someone who is being unreasonable.

"Moody" and "unpredictable" are adjectives parents will often use when referring to their teenagers.

Setting limits teaches your children valuable skills they will use the rest of their lives. One day, they will report to a job where their ability to follow rules will dictate their success.

Children mimic well. They catch what they see better than they follow what they hear.

It is what we say and do when we're angry that creates the very model our children will follow when dealing with their own frustrations.

"Rules without relationship leads to rebellion" (Josh McDowell)

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Tactics for Temper Tantrums (part 7)

 

 

Retreat

Sometimes there is nothing else but to retreat. Let the child know you will absolutely not be drawn in. This approach is justified when the stimulus to the tantrum is so absurd that it is not worth any effort  (such as the one that frequently occurs when someone fails to cut the sandwich in precisely the correct size pieces). No parent should be expected to wasted much imaginative effort on such minuscule  matters.

In this case the parent retreats to another room, bars the door and waits it out.

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Workshops

+ Behaviour Management (now available online)

This full day or 2 evening workshop will introduce you […]

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+ A Parent’s Guide to the Teenage Brain

  A teenager’s brain is not just an adult brain […]

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+ Reading Rescue

A program for children with reading problems

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+ A Guided Tour of ADHD (now available online)

This workshop will present the facts, myths, misconceptions, controversy and […]

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See more of our workshops


Contact

2720 Rath Street, Putnam, Ontario
NOL 2BO

Phone: (519) 485-4678
Fax: (519) 485-0281

Email: info@rickharper.ca

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Parents' Comments

“Our daughter was the joy of our life until she turned 13, then all hell broke loose. Rick helped us understand what was happening to her and we made some adjustments that helped us get through it. She’s now in University and doing well.”

(D.A. – St. Thomas)