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Removing a child from a traumatic environment does not remove the trauma from the child's memory.

"The thing that impresses me most about North America is the way parents obey their children"    (King Edward VII , 1841-1910)

If there is no relationship - nothing else matters !

"Moody" and "unpredictable" are adjectives parents will often use when referring to their teenagers.

Many clinicians find it easier to tell parents their child has a brain-based disorder than suggest parenting changes. Jennifer Harris (psychiatrist)

"Rules without relationship leads to rebellion" (Josh McDowell)

If you (parents) tend to overreact to your child's misbehaviour - your child learns that he can't trust you. Mom, Dad, stay regulated!

The more 2 parents differ in their approaches to discipline, the more likely it leads to trouble for the child.

Relationships matter:  change comes through forming trusting relationships. People, not programs change people.

Whining and crying are employed by kids for the purpose of getting something. If it works, then it was worth the effort and will be repeated.

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Suicide

THE NIGHTMARE of SUICIDE
Journal entry
“ I’m surprised I haven’t done it yet because I feel really terrible all the time. I just don’t have any courage but anyone else in my position would have already committed suicide.”       Rachel  age 15
                  – the peak age for suicide attempts is 16
                  – 19% of teens seriously consider suicide
                  – 6% actually attempt it
                  – only car accidents claim more teen lives than suicide
                  – in 90% of suicides there is an underlying psychiatric disorder
                                    – depression is most common
                                    – 50% of male suicides victims have depression
                                    – 70% of female suicides victims have depression
– there has been a 3 fold increase in teen suicides since 1960’s
– girls more likely to attempt suicide (2X)
– boys more likely to succeed (10X)
 
 
                  Why?      – increased drug / alcohol use
                                                      – breakdown in family
                                                      – more “pressured” world
                                                      – availability of guns
 
 
 – suicide is “contagious”
                  – other suicides result in clusters
                  – dramatizations of suicide (TV, movies, etc) are frequently followed by increased rate of suicide
                  – familial (combination of genetics & environment)
 
Suicide results from a convergence of factors
                  1. underlying psychiatric disorder
                  2. predisposition to suicidal thought
                  3. traumatic event
                                    – most common – relationship problems
                                                                        – school problems
                                                                        – trouble with law
                                                                        – bullying
                                                                        – pregnancy

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Workshops

+ Behaviour Management (now available online)

This full day or 2 evening workshop will introduce you […]

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+ A Parent’s Guide to the Teenage Brain

  A teenager’s brain is not just an adult brain […]

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+ Reading Rescue

A program for children with reading problems

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+ A Guided Tour of ADHD (now available online)

This workshop will present the facts, myths, misconceptions, controversy and […]

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Contact

2720 Rath Street, Putnam, Ontario
NOL 2BO

Phone: (519) 485-4678
Fax: (519) 485-0281

Email: info@rickharper.ca

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Parents' Comments

“Rick’s approach is so logical. He helped us clearly define the problem, analyze what has happened and select the best strategy. We now feel empowered to do something positive for our kid”

(A.N. – Tillsonburg)