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A tantruming toddler is a little ball of writhing muscle and incredible strength. It's like trying to carry a greased pig past a slop bucket.

Adolescence can be the cruelest place on earth. It can really be heartless.  ( Tori Amos)

Relationships matter:  change comes through forming trusting relationships. People, not programs change people.

We should not medicate the boys so they fit the school; we should change the school to fit the boy. (Leonard Sax, M.D. Ph.D)

It's more effective to reward your child for being "good" (appropriate) than to punish him for being "bad" (inappropriate).

The teenage years require a delicate balance between the young person's need to gain independence, and the parent's need to retain authority.

Parents are the external regulator for kids who cannot regulate themselves.

When a child is disregulated - is the time parents need to be regulated.

The mistake that Sharon and I both made is we never set any boundaries.  (Ozzy Osbourne)

Whining and crying are employed by kids for the purpose of getting something. If it works, then it was worth the effort and will be repeated.

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Depression & Discipline

CONFLICT AND DISCIPLINE
 
– conflict in a home with a teenager is inevitable
– challenge for parents is to balance firmness with support and encouragement
-parenting a depressed teen is particularly challenging
                  – “walking on eggshells”
                  – scared of pushing too far
 
TIPS
1. “Pause” button
                                    – don’t get sucked into full-scale war
                                    – exit & wait
                                    – brain dead phrases
                                    – reflectors
2. active listening
3. communicate respectfully & calmly
4. negotiate
5. give choices
6. recharge your own batteries
                                    – proper eating, sleeping
                                    – pursue a hobby
                                    – get help – clergy, support group
 
ALL FAMILIES HAVE PROBLEMS
                  – the difference between healthy & unhealthy families is how they deal with them.
                  – healthy families:                -acknowledge the problem
                                                                        -take positive steps to resolve them

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Workshops

+ Behaviour Management (now available online)

This full day or 2 evening workshop will introduce you […]

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+ A Parent’s Guide to the Teenage Brain

  A teenager’s brain is not just an adult brain […]

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+ Reading Rescue

A program for children with reading problems

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+ A Guided Tour of ADHD (now available online)

This workshop will present the facts, myths, misconceptions, controversy and […]

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Contact

2720 Rath Street, Putnam, Ontario
NOL 2BO

Phone: (519) 485-4678
Fax: (519) 485-0281

Email: info@rickharper.ca

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Parents' Comments

“You have changed our life! Thanks, it needed changing!”

(T.N. – London)