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The teenage years require a delicate balance between the young person's need to gain independence, and the parent's need to retain authority.

When a child is disregulated - is the time parents need to be regulated.

Parents are the external regulator for kids who cannot regulate themselves.

Children do not develop on their own - they only develop within relationships.

Hurt people hurt people.

"Rules without relationship leads to rebellion" (Josh McDowell)

Criticism is not a motivator.

If there is no relationship - nothing else matters !

Don't wait for him to turn 10 before you reveal that you are not in fact the hired help whose job it is to clean up after him.

"Unexpressed feeling never die. They are buried alive and come back later in ugly ways." (Stephen Covey)

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Tactics for Temper Tantrums (part 10)

 

 

Determine the Type of Tantrum

Tantrums come in 2 varieties: “development” and “manipulative. The terrible two’s is all about the “developmental” type. These are typically very intense as the child literally has lost control of himself. With increasing age, this type usually gives way to the “manipulative” tantrum that typically has less intensity and more of a conscious, planned quality. It is not always easy to distinguish between the two types. The reaction of the parent is sometimes a clue as to what type of tantrum the child is having because with a “developmental” tantrum we tend to feel a little sorry for the child. A “manipulative” tantrum tends to make us feel angry.

The “developmental” type requires understanding and involvement – the child cannot control himself. The “manipulative” type is done to control the adult and it’s sole purpose is for the child to get his way. T
his kid MUST not win this type of tantrum.

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Workshops

+ Behaviour Management (now available online)

This full day or 2 evening workshop will introduce you […]

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+ A Parent’s Guide to the Teenage Brain

  A teenager’s brain is not just an adult brain […]

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+ Reading Rescue

A program for children with reading problems

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+ A Guided Tour of ADHD (now available online)

This workshop will present the facts, myths, misconceptions, controversy and […]

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Contact

2720 Rath Street, Putnam, Ontario
NOL 2BO

Phone: (519) 485-4678
Fax: (519) 485-0281

Email: info@rickharper.ca

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