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"Parents aren't the cause of ADHD, but they are part of the solution." (Kenny Handleman, M.D.)

"Moody" and "unpredictable" are adjectives parents will often use when referring to their teenagers.

Early intervention is always better than crisis management - but it is never too late to do the right thing.

Parenting style matters - a lot!

Parents are the external regulator for kids who cannot regulate themselves.

Adolescence can be the cruelest place on earth. It can really be heartless.  ( Tori Amos)

The mistake that Sharon and I both made is we never set any boundaries.  (Ozzy Osbourne)

Children fare better when expectations on them are clear and firm.

Children do not develop on their own - they only develop within relationships.

"Rules without relationship leads to rebellion" (Josh McDowell)

Learn more.

Tantrums (9 months to 18 months)

Temper tantrums should be expected to begin at this age. There will be a sudden explosion of tears and crying. He may throw himself to the ground, stiffen his body and clench his fist. You should attempt to determine the child’s “goal” for the tantrum. If his “goal” is reasonable (eg. hunger, boredom, discomfort, etc.) you should instruct the child in more appropriate methods by which he can achieve his goal and reinforce his future efforts to do as you have instructed. If his “goal” is unreasonable (eg. avoiding putting away his toys, attention seeking, etc.) you MUST ensure that your response does not reinforce the tantrum by “giving in”. “Giving in” will teach the child that he can control you in your home by having a tantrum. Attempt to teach the child a more appropriate way of dealing with the problem, but if it is obvious that this is not the “teachable moment”, hold off until later for your teaching time. The most effective response to unreasonable demands by a child of this age are “redirection”, “extinction”, and “wait out”. You should stay within eyesight of the child. If the tantrum was an attempt to avoid a task, ensure that the child follows through with the task once the tantrum has subsided.

Next post – dealing with tantrums from 18 months to 3 years

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This full day or 2 evening workshop will introduce you […]

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+ A Parent’s Guide to the Teenage Brain

  A teenager’s brain is not just an adult brain […]

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A program for children with reading problems

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+ A Guided Tour of ADHD (now available online)

This workshop will present the facts, myths, misconceptions, controversy and […]

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“We are foster parents who took in a 13 year old girl (going on 18!) and she ran us through the wringer. Rick helped us learn how to set limits that made the difference.”

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