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The quickest way to change your child’s behaviour is to first change your own.

The mistake that Sharon and I both made is we never set any boundaries.  (Ozzy Osbourne)

The teenage years require a delicate balance between the young person's need to gain independence, and the parent's need to retain authority.

Don't wait for him to turn 10 before you reveal that you are not in fact the hired help whose job it is to clean up after him.

It's more effective to reward your child for being "good" (appropriate) than to punish him for being "bad" (inappropriate).

Early intervention is always better than crisis management - but it is never too late to do the right thing.

Whining and crying are employed by kids for the purpose of getting something. If it works, then it was worth the effort and will be repeated.

"Moody" and "unpredictable" are adjectives parents will often use when referring to their teenagers.

Hurt people hurt people.

If you (parents) tend to overreact to your child's misbehaviour - your child learns that he can't trust you. Mom, Dad, stay regulated!

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ADHD – A Frustrated Parent

The following is a quote from a parent that  is both very frustrated and at the same time very concerned about her son.

“I can’t take it anymore! We scream all morning to get out of the house. Homework takes hours. If I don’t help him with his work, he’s so disorganized that he’ll never get it done. If I do help him, he screams at me. Since he never finishes anything, everyone thinks he doesn’t care. No matter how much we beg, or punish, he keeps doing the same stupid things over and over again. He never considers the consequences of his actions, and he doesn’t seem to care if they hurt me. It’s so easy for him to get overwhelmed. He is so inflexible, and then blows up over anything. It gets me so angry that I scream back, which makes everything even worse. Now that he’s getting older, the lies and the cursing is getting worse, too. I know he has trouble paying attention, but why does he have all these other problems as well?”

Words that often describe the feeling that parents of children with ADHD / ADD have include:

  • frustrated
  • stressed out
  • frightened
  • angry
  • exhausted
  • discouraged
  • burned out
  • worried
  • overwhelmed
  • confused
  • inadequate
  • embarrassed
  • trapped
  • helpless
  • hopeless

These feelings are real and parents need to have a safe place to express them but they also need to understand that they must  discover a way to manage those feelings. The best way to do that is to figure out the best way to manage your child’s symptoms.

Behavioural Management Systems has been helping families figure out the best way to manage their children’s behaviour for over 40 years.

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Workshops

+ Behaviour Management (now available online)

This full day or 2 evening workshop will introduce you […]

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+ Lick Your Kids

  “Lick Your Kids” (figuratively not literally) (2 hours) First […]

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+ A Parent’s Guide to the Teenage Brain

  A teenager’s brain is not just an adult brain […]

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+ Reading Rescue

A program for children with reading problems

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+ Taming a Toddler

Many parents wonder what hit them when their sweet little baby turns into an unreasonable toddler – ideas for dealing with mealtime, bedtime, temper tanturms, toilet training, noncompliance, etc.

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See more of our workshops


Contact

2720 Rath Street, Putnam, Ontario
NOL 2BO

Phone: (519) 485-4678
Fax: (519) 485-0281

Email: info@rickharper.ca

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Parents' Comments

“Implementing Rick’s techniques and adhering to them is exhausting, but it is a healthy exhaustion rather than the detrimental exhaustion I used to experience.”

(B.F. – Woodstock)