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It's more effective to reward your child for being "good" (appropriate) than to punish him for being "bad" (inappropriate).

The quickest way to change your child’s behaviour is to first change your own.

If you are headed in the wrong direction as a parent - you are allowed to make a U-turn.

Good parenting requires sacrifice. Childhood lasts for only a few brief years , but it should be given priority while it is passing before your eyes

"Unexpressed feeling never die. They are buried alive and come back later in ugly ways." (Stephen Covey)

"To be a man, a boy must see a man."  (J.R. Moehringer)

Relationships matter:  change comes through forming trusting relationships. People, not programs change people.

Setting limits teaches your children valuable skills they will use the rest of their lives. One day, they will report to a job where their ability to follow rules will dictate their success.

Removing a child from a traumatic environment does not remove the trauma from the child's memory.

Hurt people hurt people.

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Caregiving – FASD (part 3)

3 steps to managing children with FASD

a) Recognize that FASD is a medical condition

– FASD is not a bad attitude

– it must be treated as a medical condition

– society has denied this reality of FASD and blames the indivivual

– “just sit down and behave” is unrealistic

– punishing a child with FASD for brain damage is useless

– society (homes, schools, treatment centres, hospitals, jail) seldom provide adequate                                          supports

– children with visible handicaps receive more supports

b)  Involve the individual with FASD in their management as early as possible

– often caregivers shield the individual from their diagnosis  – shame, guilt

– best if the individual knows the truth

– care must be taken to not remove responsibility from the child for his actions (this is a                                      delicate balancing act)

c) Discard or modify treatments that have previously failed

– the “usual” interventions fail because individuals with FASD cannot learn in the time                                    given to them

– the individual lacks impulse control. boundaries, etc.

– interventions are too short term – caregivers give up too soon

– schools try to “mainstream” when the child is unable to cope behaviourally or                                                   socially

There is no single approach that is best for all FASD children!

Whatever approach is used, compassion is vital but it can become lost in the day to day struggles, challenges, failures and misbehaviours.

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Workshops

+ Behaviour Management (now available online)

This full day or 2 evening workshop will introduce you […]

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+ Lick Your Kids

  “Lick Your Kids” (figuratively not literally) (2 hours) First […]

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+ A Parent’s Guide to the Teenage Brain

  A teenager’s brain is not just an adult brain […]

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+ Reading Rescue

A program for children with reading problems

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+ Taming a Toddler

Many parents wonder what hit them when their sweet little baby turns into an unreasonable toddler – ideas for dealing with mealtime, bedtime, temper tanturms, toilet training, noncompliance, etc.

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See more of our workshops


Contact

2720 Rath Street, Putnam, Ontario
NOL 2BO

Phone: (519) 485-4678
Fax: (519) 485-0281

Email: info@rickharper.ca

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Parents' Comments

“We are foster parents who took in a 13 year old girl (going on 18!) and she ran us through the wringer. Rick helped us learn how to set limits that made the difference.”

(G.E. – Strathroy)