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Adolescence can be the cruelest place on earth. It can really be heartless.  ( Tori Amos)

Children do not develop on their own - they only develop within relationships.

The quickest way to change your child’s behaviour is to first change your own.

Parents are the external regulator for kids who cannot regulate themselves.

There has been an explosion in the prescribing of medication for very young children, particularly preschool and kindergarten boys (Juli Zito , Univ. of Maryland)

Criticism is not a motivator.

Hurt people hurt people.

The teenage years require a delicate balance between the young person's need to gain independence, and the parent's need to retain authority.

The challenge of adolescence is to balance the right of the parents to feel they are in charge with the need of the adolescent to gain independence.

It's more effective to reward your child for being "good" (appropriate) than to punish him for being "bad" (inappropriate).

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Counselling

Another option commonly pursued in finding solutions to children’s behaviour problems is counselling. The approaches in this grouping represent very broad and divergent directions, but all of them employ communication between a therapist and the client. At one extreme end of the counselling continuum we have psychotherapy. Theories developed by Sigmund Freud and his adherents believe that the root cause of  person’s inappropriate behaviours lie in unresolved conflicts in the client’s past (frequently involving mother!). [...]

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The “Biochemical” Option

Assuming the doctor has not found a “clearly definable” medical problem, another option to consider is biochemical. The words you use to describe your child’s behaviour may suggest to the doctor that there is a problem with the biochemistry of the brain. Brain chemistry abnormalities is theorized to be the cause of many disorders that result in behaviour problems. Conditions such as ADHD, conduct disorder, obsessive compulsive disorder, depression and dozens of others are believed [...]

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The 5 “Conventional” Options

All the ideas regarding treating behavioural problems from the “conventional” experts could be placed into 1 of 5 broad categories. 1. medical 2. biochemical 3. counselling 4. skills acquisition 5. behavioural The next series of blog entries will summarize what these categories entail. 1. Medical One of experts that parents turn to for help is often the child’s pediatrician. During the office appointment the parent describes the behaviours of concern and the doctor will probably [...]

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Why This Blog??

Why this blog? What a good question! With literally 100’s of books in print and 1000’s of websites and blogs devoted to children’s behaviour problems – why indeed do we need another contribution? The short answer is because so many people have asked me for it. At the completion of virtually every workshop I present, at least one participant asks me to recommend a book or source that summarizes what I’ve talked about. There is [...]

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Archive Test

This is a test of the archive.

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Workshops

+ Behaviour Management

This full day or 2 evening workshop will introduce you [...]

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+ Lick Your Kids

  “Lick Your Kids” (figuratively not literally) (2 hours) First [...]

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+ A Parent’s Guide to the Teenage Brain

  A teenager’s brain is not just an adult brain [...]

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+ Reading Rescue

A program for children with reading problems

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+ Taming a Toddler

Many parents wonder what hit them when their sweet little baby turns into an unreasonable toddler – ideas for dealing with mealtime, bedtime, temper tanturms, toilet training, noncompliance, etc.

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See more of our workshops


Contact

2720 Rath Street, Putnam, Ontario
NOL 2BO

Phone: (519) 485-4678
Fax: (519) 485-0281

Email: info@rickharper.ca

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Parents' Comments

“We were so naive. We thought our son’s poor behaviour was just a phase he was passing through. Thankfully you led us ‘out of the wilderness’”

(N.S. – London)