welcome image

The challenge of adolescence is to balance the right of the parents to feel they are in charge with the need of the adolescent to gain independence.

A tantruming toddler is a little ball of writhing muscle and incredible strength. It's like trying to carry a greased pig past a slop bucket.

Good parenting requires sacrifice. Childhood lasts for only a few brief years , but it should be given priority while it is passing before your eyes

Some hope their children will be like sponges soaking up the truth and wisdom imparted by their parents. However appealing this philosophy might be, it seldom seems to catch on with their children.

The quickest way to change your child’s behaviour is to first change your own.

Early intervention is always better than crisis management - but it is never too late to do the right thing.

"Moody" and "unpredictable" are adjectives parents will often use when referring to their teenagers.

"Cutting" is a visible sign to the world that you are hurting.

Children mimic well. They catch what they see better than they follow what they hear.

Adolescence can be the cruelest place on earth. It can really be heartless.  ( Tori Amos)

Learn more.

Separating from Parents

 

 

Being a parent of a teen can cure a person of narcissism. When your child was born, you were the center of  his/her universe. You were special . Now that you have an adolescent, you have become less central. No matter what you do, your teen continues to invest in the outside world more than at home.

This is how it should be. Teens slowly move away from their parents physically and  emotionally. Over time, they change from being “family-centric” to being “friends-centric”.  Their interests and activities revolve more and more around their friends. In addition, when children enter adolescence, they begin questioning their parents’ values, ideas and beliefs and begin formulating their own. This too is as it should be. The dependent nature of the parent-child relationship is designed to end at some point.

In order to become healthy, functioning adults, children must sever the ties to their parents, often transforming the relationship into a friendship. Children can’t enter the world if they have not separated from parents!

So the issue is not whether your teen should separate from you, but how, for there is a right way to separate and a wrong away way.

Back to Top

Workshops

+ Behaviour Management (now available online)

This full day or 2 evening workshop will introduce you […]

Learn more

+ A Parent’s Guide to the Teenage Brain

  A teenager’s brain is not just an adult brain […]

Learn more

+ Reading Rescue

A program for children with reading problems

Learn more

+ A Guided Tour of ADHD (now available online)

This workshop will present the facts, myths, misconceptions, controversy and […]

Learn more

See more of our workshops


Contact

2720 Rath Street, Putnam, Ontario
NOL 2BO

Phone: (519) 485-4678
Fax: (519) 485-0281

Email: info@rickharper.ca

Archive


Parents' Comments

“We are foster parents who took in a 13 year old girl (going on 18!) and she ran us through the wringer. Rick helped us learn how to set limits that made the difference.”

(G.E. – Strathroy)