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Criticism is not a motivator.

If there is no relationship - nothing else matters !

Relationships matter:  change comes through forming trusting relationships. People, not programs change people.

The challenge of adolescence is to balance the right of the parents to feel they are in charge with the need of the adolescent to gain independence.

A tantruming toddler is a little ball of writhing muscle and incredible strength. It's like trying to carry a greased pig past a slop bucket.

"Parents aren't the cause of ADHD, but they are part of the solution." (Kenny Handleman, M.D.)

"Cutting" is a visible sign to the world that you are hurting.

We should not medicate the boys so they fit the school; we should change the school to fit the boy. (Leonard Sax, M.D. Ph.D)

If you (parents) tend to overreact to your child's misbehaviour - your child learns that he can't trust you. Mom, Dad, stay regulated!

"To be a man, a boy must see a man."  (J.R. Moehringer)

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Parenting a FASD Toddler

The main developmental tasks for a toddler are:

– to learn he is a separate person

– to learn his body is his own

– to learn his ideas and feelings have value

Life becomes increasingly frustrating for the toddler as the demands and expectations placed on him increase. He will discover that he is unable to do many of the things he wants to do himself eg. feed, dress himself, etc.)

Guidelines for toddlers with FASD

  • consistency, routine and help remain paramount
  • caregiving can begin to be shared by a few others
  • daycare can provide relief
  • power struggles begin to emerge (the “terrible two’s”)
  • normal household expectations can be overwhelming(eg. clean the playroom)
  • FASD toddler behaviour problems begin to be a major source of conflict with siblings
  • your anger and lectures are useless management tools
  • natural and logical consequences have limited success
  • gear all opportunities for success
  • structure, routine, consistency & repetition are key tools
  • works best if FASD child is the youngest in the home

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Workshops

+ Behaviour Management (now available online)

This full day or 2 evening workshop will introduce you […]

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+ A Parent’s Guide to the Teenage Brain

  A teenager’s brain is not just an adult brain […]

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+ Reading Rescue

A program for children with reading problems

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+ A Guided Tour of ADHD (now available online)

This workshop will present the facts, myths, misconceptions, controversy and […]

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See more of our workshops


Contact

2720 Rath Street, Putnam, Ontario
NOL 2BO

Phone: (519) 485-4678
Fax: (519) 485-0281

Email: info@rickharper.ca

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Parents' Comments

“We are foster parents who took in a 13 year old girl (going on 18!) and she ran us through the wringer. Rick helped us learn how to set limits that made the difference.”

(G.E. – Strathroy)